I needed the break. Our second child is scheduled to be delivered on December 18th. Of course, that means a ton of prep over the last couple months, including much-needed cleaning, a lot of furniture building, and rearranging everything. And then there is Christmas. Which I kind of love more than any other holiday.
So with an extended weekend because of Thanksgiving, we got a lot done in the Finley Home. Mostly during (well-fought) naps of our daughter Lottie. But I also got some good development time in to work on a couple of projects. I pushed two of the first updates Web Tools has seen in almost a year. For an app that I barely touch, it is still pulling about $200 a month in sales.
I also built a dresser, cycled 30 miles, got our live Christmas tree (see above), and ate a fair amount while attempting not to gain any — regret-inducing — weight. I'm down 25 pounds since the start of Summer and would prefer to keep it that way.
So: great weekend. Relaxation, code, family, and food. I give thanks to God for all of that. My wife is amazing, my daughter is a dream that I enjoy daily, and we have so many blessings in our life that I cannot begin to list.
Instead of common thinking that our kids need to "sow their wild oats" when they are young, research suggests that the behaviors, addictions, and poor choices of our developmental years stay with us. God can always help us to overcome the baggage, but it's never an easy process.
I.N.F.O. for Families
Unfortunately more information has come out about Josh Duggar. The media loves to shred people and— using information from a website, specifically built to help people have affairs, that was hacked and published online— have jumped on the story of Josh Duggar having an affair. This is horrible and a major hit to his integrity has a Christian, even more for it to be happening in the public square. Often times, these things come out behind closed doors and families deal with them and no one ever hears a word.
We need to realize that this family needs our prayers more than anything. Our God is a god of mercy and grace, forgiveness and love. The desires of the Lord are that this marriage stay together, that forgiveness is sought and given. The lions are circling and waiting, pushing and prodding to make the opposite happen. We need to pray that this family circles around this young couple in prayer and as wise counsel.
As for us, we need to be reminded if our sin and the wages of sin over time when not confronted. Our children today are not only encountering sexual sin much earlier, but be encouraged by their elders to partake in it much earlier. We must talk with our children earlier than ever and warn them, coach them, and parent them. We will be the weird ones of the world, but we always have been.
None of us can afford to sit idly by. We must be diligent to coach our kids on healthy sexuality. We must tell them that it is precious, beautiful, and worth saving for marriage. We must share with them about the addictive dangers of porn. Beyond the "just say no" language of many, we have to have frequent, relevant and usually awkward conversations about what it looks like to choose God's best in a world that commonly chooses poorly.
Here’s the thing. We all have a sin problem. Often times we make mistakes that directly affect others. While sexual sins are often considered the worst, we must recognize that as Christ has forgiven our sins, so must we forgive others. If things are the way they appear to have been, 14-year-old Josh Duggar made some bad choices. Instead of taking this public and ruining his life, the family dealt with it in a biblical manner, seeking wise council and help from the Church. Forgiveness was sought and given. This was now 10 years ago.
As a church, we should applaud the way that this was dealt with– if this proves to be accurate— and see this as a model way of running our families when sin rears it’s ugly head.
We should also, as a church, pray for this family in this hard time. The world loves to drag out our sins and call us hypocrites. It makes it all the more important for Christians to publicly declare that we are not perfect, sinless, Jesus freaks. No, we are broken, weary men and women that have recognized our need of a savior. We need to pray for our fellow brothers and sisters that they stay strong under this attack and show what Christ would want.